Dating Tip: Don't Date People Who Drunk Dial

At 12:29 a.m. on Sunday, January 27, Dodge County, Wisconsin, 911 dispatchers received a call.

"I'd like to report a drunk driver. She's in a tan, 2002 pickup truck with an 'I heart cheese' bumper sticker. Also, there's two empty Snapple bottles on the backseat and 'You Give Love a Bad Name' is playing on the radio."

Then the caller hung up.
So they *69ed her.

"Hello, this is Patricia Dykstra, how may I help you?"
"This is Dodge County 911; you just called about a drunk driver."
"Oh yeah, my boyfriend told me to do it. He thinks I'm too drunk to drive home, but he's the one who's wasted."
"Are you drunk, ma'am?"
"Don't think so."
"Where are you now?"
"I'm heading north on Yew Road."
"Ooh, watch out, that road has a lot of potholes."
"Yeah, I'm swerving around 'em. You know, I really don't feel safe driving and talking on the phone."
"Okay, Pat, you drive safe now. Call anytime."

Ms. Dykstra, 51, and her boyfriend arrived home safely. They chatted with the police officers who were there to greet them, explaining that he had drank a twelve-pack, and that she had drank only a six-pack, so the smart choice was for her to drive. The cops told them to have a nice night, and gave Patricia a drunk-driving ticket.


This tip could also be titled "Don't Date 911 Dispatchers Who Don't Tell Drunk Drivers to Pull Over and Continue to Talk to the Drunk Driver on the Phone While the Drunk Driver Drives.