It is normal practice for UCLA campus police officers to ask students in computer labs after 11:00 p.m. to show their student IDs. If the questioned person can’t produce a student ID, they are asked to leave the lab. Understandable. Thank you for protecting America’s college students, campus security.
But you know what would be even better? If you used Tasers on these crazy, late-night computer users. Especially if their skin is any darker than a Krispy Kreme Original Glazed doughnut. I mean, it’s scientific fact that the melanin content of a person’s skin is directly proportional to his or her tendency to commit acts of terror. Look at Timothy McVeigh and Ted Kaczynski. And most likely these non-student-ID carriers are plotting something secretive and horrible in a very public place. For example, an Iranian American male would never withhold showing you his ID because he feels unfairly targeted based on his appearance. No way. Racial profiling is just a myth like global warming anyway.
When using Tasers the following must be strictly adhered to:
1. Use absolutely no discretion with persons not meeting the aforementioned Krispy Kreme guideline.
2. Make sure the Taser is used after the person is handcuffed. This is when the Taser is most effective.
3. If the detainee goes limp once handcuffed (passive resistance), Tase said detainee to make him or her stop resisting “arrest.”
4. Repeatedly demand that the Tased person stand (get up off of the floor) after you’ve Tased them, knowing that the Tasing will have left the person uncontrollably immobile for five to fifteen minutes. When they do not get up, which you know they will not/cannot, Tase them again.
5. Under no circumstances listen to any logical argument from the person being Tased (e.g., “I was leaving until you stopped me,” “I’m already handcuffed and wasn’t fighting back,” etc.), or from fellow late-night computer users and computer lab staff (e.g., “You’re abusing your power,” “There are two of you and one of him and he is handcuffed,” “Stop!” etc.).
Always remember that your uniform gives you the right to basically do anything you want, especially the right to assert your authority in ridiculous and inhumane ways that mask your insecurity. Uniform = God/Supreme Ruler/King/Penis. And no civilian can argue against the Uniform, no matter what doughnut they look like.
A word of caution: If you are going to proceed with this procedure, it is best to confiscate the cell phones of eye witnesses: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AyvrqcxNIFs&eurl=
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment